I usually consider myself to be relatively good at finding deals online, whether they be for electronics, home furnishings, or anything else you can probably think of. Unfortunately, one area where I am sorely lacking is securing good deals on travel and airfare. This could possibly be because it's somewhat hard in today's day and age to get a truly "good" deal on travel and airfare, or maybe because I'm just not looking in the right places. The following is a list I compiled (with some help - see below) of some potentially good sites and locations where such deals may be had:
George Bush goes to a primary school to talk to the kids to get a little PR. After his talk he offers question time. One little boy puts up his hand and George asks him his name.
"Stanley ,"........ responds the little boy.
"And what is your question, Stanley?"
"I have 4 questions:
First, why did the USA invade Iraq without the support of the UN?
Second, why are you President when Al Gore got more votes?
Third, whatever happened to Osama Bin Laden?
Fourth, why are we so worried about gay-marriage when 1/2 of all Americans don't have health insurance?
Just then, the bell rings for recess. George Bush informs the kiddies that they will continue after recess.
When they resume George says, "OK, where were we? Oh, that's right, question time. Who has a question?"
Another little boy puts up his hand. George points him out and asks him his name.
"Steve," he responds.
"And what is your question, Steve?"
"Actually, I have 6 questions:
First, why did the USA invade Iraq without the support of the UN?
Second, why are you President when Al Gore got more votes?
Third, whatever happened to Osama Bin Laden?
Fourth, why are we so worried about gay marriage when 1/2 of all Americans don't have health insurance?
Fifth, why did the recess bell go off 20 minutes early?
And Sixth, .....what the hell happened to Stanley ?"
He descended a bit more and shouted "Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don't know where I am."
The woman below replied, "You're in a hot air balloon hovering approximately 30 feet above the ground. You're between 40 and 41 degrees north latitude and between 59 and 60 degrees west longitude."
"You must be in Information Technology," said the balloonist.
"I am," replied the woman, "How did you know?"
"Well," answered the balloonist, "everything you told me is technically correct, but I've no idea what to make of your information, and the fact is I'm still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help at all. If anything, you've delayed my trip."
The woman below responded, "You must be in Management."
"I am," replied the balloonist, "but how did you know?"
"Well," said the woman, "you don't know where you are or where you're going. You have risen to where you are due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise, which you've no idea how to keep, and you expect people beneath you to solve your problems. The fact is you are in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but now, somehow, it's my fault."
This is an email sent out from Tracie Rosenbaum regarding the fundraiser:
Hi everyone!
This letter will confirm what you already know: that I cannot sit still for the life of me and that I am indeed crazy. First I will tell you of my plans to race around the streets and bays of St. Petersburg, Florida by swimming for one mile, biking for 25 miles, and running for 6 miles. Then I will ask you to help me achieve this for a wonderful cause.
You see, earlier this year I joined the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society's Team in Training. Team in Training teaches people like me to participate in endurance events, like a triathlon, as a way to raise money for the more than 1110,000 people in the United States who will be diagnosed with some form of blood cancer this year alone.
Nearly everyone has been personally affected by cancer and few organizations are as proactive in finding a cure for this disease as the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society. If you are thinking you don't know anyone who has had these diseases, consider this: the funds raised by the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society are what enabled chemotherapy to come into existence, which as we know saves lives of those suffering from all types of cancer.
As an admissions counselor, I did the math and figured that for every two college applications I read (or a quarter of a basketball game if that's more you're style), one person will die of a blood cancer.
Please consider supporting the society and me as we fight this disease. My personal goal is to raise $4100 by triathlon race day on April 29, 2007. Any donation of course is 100% tax deductible, and much appreciated.
PERSPECTIVE GRAPH
***REMEMBER: ANY AMOUNT YOU CAN AFFORD WILL BE A HUGE HELP AND GO TOWARD A GREAT CAUSE***
You can donate easily online on my secure site. Go to:
Jay Leno, "The Tonight Show": "The White House announced this week it will not have a new Iraq strategy until after the start of the new year. Apparently, President Bush is hoping that Santa will bring him one."
Comedy writer Alex Kaseberg: "The California company contracted to build a 700-mile fence to keep out illegal immigrants at the Mexican border was charged with hiring illegal immigrants. That's like the [Federal Communications Commission] trying to crack down on bad language by hiring Michael Richards."
Conan O'Brien, "Late Night with Conan O'Brien": "Today at the White House, President Bush signed a deal that would send nuclear fuel to India. When asked about the Indian deal, President Bush said, 'It's the least we can do after stealing your land.'"
Comedy writer Jake Novak: "Knicks coach Isiah Thomas was not punished after a brawl at the end of a recent Knicks-Denver Nuggets game. The league realized that keeping him at the helm is punishment enough."
Comedy writer Alan Ray: "Animator Joe Barbera is dead at 95. The creator of the Flintstones will be paid tribute during the funeral procession. The hearse will be powered by the driver's feet."
Jay Leno, "The Tonight Show": "President Bush has received a copy of the 96-page Iraq Study Group report. When they gave it to him, he said, 'Don't tell me how it ends.' They said, 'Uh, it doesn't.'"
Conan O'Brien, "Late Night with Conan O'Brien": "Over the weekend Sen. Barack Obama visited New Hampshire, and thousands of people showed up to hear him speak. The New Hampshire crowds were excited, because apparently this is the first time they've ever seen an African-American."
Jon Stewart, "The Daily Show with Jon Stewart": "Republicans used their last days in power to pass last-minute tax cuts, expand oil drilling in the Gulf of Mexico, clear GOP leadership of wrongdoing in the Mark Foley scandal and pardon Hitler."
Comedy writer Alan Ray: "The NBA will go back to the leather basketball in January. The Philadelphia 76ers say the one made of micro fiber was extremely hard to control, reminding them too much of Allen Iverson."
Comedy writer Alex Kaseberg: "When she was booked for DUI, Nicole Ritchie weighed 85 pounds. Rosie O'Donnell's softball bat weighs more than that."
O'Brien on the White House Christmas tree falling over: "Even after the tree collapsed, President Bush insisted that [it] was doing a heckuva job."
Leno on the news that Vice President Dick Cheney's lesbian daughter is pregnant: "The big guessing game in Washington now is: Who donated the sperm? I'm guessing Ann Coulter."
David Letterman, "Late Show with David Letterman": "This is the time of the year everybody's getting ready for the holidays. Earlier today, Dick Cheney brought home a Christmas tree that he shot."
Comedy writer Alex Kaseberg: "Sen. Hillary Clinton is asking fellow lawmakers if she should run for president in 2008. The good news is she is getting encouragement to run from key legislators. The bad news is they're Republicans."
Michael Feldman, public radio's "Whad'Ya Know?": "President Bush intends to remain in Iraq, whether the troops go or not. He's already picked up 40 acres outside Basra for Prairie Chapel Ranch-East. Laura's not real happy, but is dutifully working on the sampler."
Comedy writer Alan Ray: "Hugo Chavez was re-elected in Venezuela. His success baffles the U.S. How can a control freak, who won't listen to others and doesn't care about his image overseas, ever get elected president?"
Jay Leno, "The Tonight Show": "The federal government has a new citizenship test. They said the old test for immigrants is too outdated. Apparently, it was in English."
Comedy writer Rob Bates: "Lewis Hamilton was recently chosen to become the first black driver in Formula One racing. His first race was interrupted when a cop pulled him over."
There's a few of my favorites that are missing unfortunately from the above links, such as Mr. Enormous SUV Driver and Mr. Doggy Halloween Costume Designer...if anyone knows where to find these, please let me know or leave a comment with the location. Thanks!
