Conan O'Brien, "Late Night with Conan O'Brien": "Last week at the White House, President Bush met with the prime minister of India. There was an awkward moment when Bush asked the Indian prime minister, 'Now that you're here, could you see why my computer is acting up?'"
Comedy writer Jim Barach: "Interior Department official Dan Smith resigned after it was revealed he shot a buffalo at a ranch owned by a Texas billionaire. Of course, the last government official who shot something at a Texas billionaire's ranch bagged a lawyer."
Comedy writer Alan Ray: "Thousands in Queens were without electricity [for a week]. The previous record for going without power there was set by the New York Jets."
David Letterman, "Late Show with David Letterman": "It's continuing to be hot down there in Washington, D.C. As a matter of fact, it's so hot President Bush talked to the NAACP just for the cool reception."
Comedy writer Matt Passet: "Haley Joel Osment, the star of the movie 'The Sixth Sense,' was in a minor car accident this week. Doctors say he is fine, but his career is still in critical condition."
Comedy writer Jake Novak: "Despite gas prices reaching an all-time high, U.S. demand for gas is still higher than it was last year. That's because everyone is driving around looking for a place that sells cheaper gas."
