A lot of these are really stupid…but I found a few to be kinda funny 
[stupid humor department]
Two antennas meet on a roof, fall in love and get married. The ceremony wasn’t much, but the reception was excellent.
Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar. One says, “I’ve lost my electron.” “The other says, “Are you sure?” The first replies, “Yes, I’m positive…”
A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, “I’ll serve you but don’t start anything.”
A sandwich walks into a bar. The bartender says, “Sorry we don’t serve food in here.”
A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says: “A beer please, and one for the road.”
Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other: “Does this taste funny to you?”
“Doc, I can’t stop singing ‘The Green, Green Grass of Home.’” “That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome.” “Is it common?” “It’s Not Unusual.”
Two cows are standing next to each other in a field. Daisy says to Dolly, “I was artificially inseminated this morning.” “I don’t believe you,” said Dolly. “It’s true, no bull!” exclaimed Daisy.
An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either.
A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet and says, “My dog’s cross-eyed, is there any thing you can do for him?” “Well,” says the vet, “let’s have a look at him.” So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes. Finally, he says, “I’m going to have to put him down.” “What? Because he’s cross-eyed?” “No, because my arms hurt.”
I went to the butcher’s the other day to bet him 50 bucks that he couldn’t reach the meat off the top shelf. He said, “No, the steaks are too high.”
A man woke up in a hospital after a serious accident. He shouted, Doctor, doctor, I can’t feel my legs!” The doctor replied, “I know you can’t – I’ve cut off your arms!”
Two Inuit sitting in a kayak were chilly; but when they lit a fire in the craft, it sank, proving that you can’t have your kayak and heat it too.
What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.
A horse walks into a bar. The bartender takes one look at him and says “Why the long face?”
A Rabbi and and a Priest walk into a bar. The bartender takes one look and says “I know this one”.
A three-legged dog walks into a bar and says “I’m looking for the man who shot my paw!”
Why did the chicken go to the seance? To get to the other side.
A man answers an ad for a free talking dog. The dog’s owner points him to the shed, where the dog is. The dog tells him “I was once a spy for the CIA, FBI, NSA, and DEA, because no one suspected a talking dog. Then I had a few litters, and retired a respected and wealthy dog.” The man asked the owner “Why would you get rid of a great dog like that?” The owner replied “He’s a liar! He never did any of that stuff.”